1. Eros (romantic love)
2. Ludus (game-playing love)
3. Storge (friendship love)
4. Mania (possessive or dependent love)
5. Pragma (logical love)
6. Agape (self-sacrificing love)
This article focuses on ludus love. Previous research has found that people with the ludus love type are more likely to be sexually aggressive. (Sarwer, Kalichman, Johnson, Early, & Akram 1993).
In this study, 305 participants were recruited from an American university. All participants reported that they were heterosexual and single. They had to fill out the Love Attitudes Scale, disclose their current relationship status, and report their sexual history (how many sexual partners they have had, etc). The findings showed that more men than women had the ludus love type. Sexual experience was also related to ludus.
lhttp://www.askmen.com/dating/curtsmith_100/122b_dating_advice.html This article (also from AskMen.com) aims to help men deal with "women's mind games". My article suggests that in fact, men are more likely to play mind games then women, yet I've never seen an article aimed at women about men's mind games. The AskMen article says that one of the ways women play mind games is to refuse sex ( she gets you hot and bothered and then backs off, or otherwise restricts your access to sex). Apparently women must consent to sex all the time or they are playing mind games. It is interesting that the author of this article doesn't seem to respect a women's right to say no to sex, and that is one of the aspects of ludus, or game-playing love. This article is extremely offensive to women, and it is not the only article I found on AskMen about mind games that women play. I am finding that AskMen.com is one of the biggest culprits of perpetuating the Crazy Girl stereotype.
References
Hensleym W. E. (1996). The effect of a ludus love style on sexual experience. Social Behavior And Personality, 24(3), 205-212. doi:10.2224/sbp.1996.24.3.205
Sarwer DB, Kalichman SC, Johnson JR, Early J, Ali S (1993). Sexual Aggression and Love Styles: An Exploratory Study. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 22, 265-275.
I think the idea of game-playing love is kind of ridiculous. Anyone can play mind games, but it is always stereo-typically women who are said to do so. It's interesting to compare Sternberg's model to Hensley's, but I think Sternberg is more on the mark. I completely agree with your opinion on AskMen.com and how sexist it is towards women. It plays into the stereotype that women and men are from completely different planets and men need to read article after article to figure out how to understand women.
ReplyDeleteIt is very clear that whom ever the author is of this article clearly does not like women. I wonder if this man goes on dates or has ever had a serious relationship. I feel sad for him if he honestly believes everything he has written. Skyla is absolutely correct in saying that anyone can play games, and if men honestly believe the stereotype that women play games, then are they not playing back....hmmm.
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